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Discordia; our Goddess |
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"Gordo! Gordo! Gordo!" the pagans cry, in almost disturbing unison, as they
dance around a raging bonfire. Each one of them holding a sacred gourd towards the
sky. This is called gord festival, it is held at the optimum time to find a shitload
of gourds, and its main purpose is to frighten neighbors. It is a holiday in my
religion, Discordianism. It is the worship of the goddess Discordia, or Eris.
She is the goddess of chaos, and is often depicted as a ghastly looking woman with her
clothes in rags clutching a dagger in her bosom, (most women look ghastly when clutching a
chilling dagger in their bosom.) All Discordians are prohibited from believing anything that we read. Including our holy book, Principia Discordia (or how I found godess and what I did to her when I found her.) Wherin is explained absolutely everything worth knowing about absolutely anything. Due to the lack of Discordian temples in my area (and, quite possibly, on my planet) I have joined a Discordian Quabbalah, (which is sort of like a coven), in which I am The High Holy Boss of Religion, and of course, a Discordian priestess. The only qualifications needed to be ordained as a Discordian priestess/priest is the desire to be ordained. |
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