My sister's babysitter

By, Lauren Deland

This article may be an unpleasant read. I'm going to be writing about an addiction that we all have in ommon; one that's stealing our time, our social skills, and our minds. And unlike addictions to Nancy Drew novels, (which they now have a support group for, thank God) nobody acknowledges this addiction as a bad thing. I'm willing to bet that everyone reading this article subscribes to this addiction, at least mildly- I, the author, mysleft am guilty.

I speak of television.

TV is my sister's nany. It's humming in the next room right now, filling our small apartment with the sound from our considerably large TV Lindsay (my sister) spends most of her afternoons, and almost every evening in front of our glossy, black, glowing box. Gazing at the one eye that stares, but never glares. The never-ending story of other people's misfortune that somehow makes s forget our own. The friend that- while it doesn't talk, at least it doesn't talk back.

Americans are absorbed in the media's world. We know more about the lives of sitcom stars than the lives of our neighbors. This is bad because Jay Leno isn't going to bring over a bag of groceries if Dad loses his job. To watch TV is to admire and adore people who you will almost certainly never know, who will never give a damn about you.

Television has been evil from the beginning- during the Stalin era, the Russians showed trials featuring people betraying their family and friends, condemning them to death on camera. This is slightly reminiscent of modern talk shows. Poor and needy people manipulated into revealing their most private pain for slack-jawed yokels to gawk at.

However, while the Russians did it to save their lives, Americans are selling their souls for 15 seconds of celebrity. And while we watch it, we are selling a tiny chunk of ours.

I know the reasons people watch TV - because they're my reasons too. Boredom, loneliness, need to blank out, and entertainment. Human beings, (namely your family and friends, if they haven't been shot by Russians) can provide an antidote for these feelings too. The problem is, thousands of children are filling their evenings with electronic entertaiment because their parents are out making a living, (the real reason that the V-chip was created.)

My solution? 'Tis better to be poor, parents. Don't work overtime to buy jewelry and video games for your kids, and Valium for your anxiety over leaving them alone all of the time.

Save yourselves.

In conclusion, as my sister falls asleep in my mother's lap in front of the TV, the only time they really have together. I don't see her much either; always managing to be busy with friends, or homework, or at play. Lindsay's friend, teacher, and babysitter is still the TV, probably does a better job than I do. Since I'm in my bedroom writing this instead of out there trying.

Anyway, I have a friend who has a friend whose dad threw a brick through their TV just because he was sick of it.

I encourage you to do the same.